Alyice on September 14th, 2009

Random Acts Of Kindness

When I was a young gal, my mother gave me a beautiful sapphire ring. I wore it until after the birth of my first child. The weight gain didn’t disappear and the ring no longer fit.

Ten years, or so, later, I met a woman online named Anna. She and her husband had been going through a rough patch financially due to medical/health problems and after a few years of marriage, she still didn’t have a wedding ring. She didn’t even have an engagement ring.

She loved her husband and understood that a ring was merely a possession, but a part of her longed for a wedding ring; longed for a way to silently let the world know that she was taken—that someone loved her enough to commit his life to her.

I remember looking down at my wedding ring; a simple crown with a tiny diamond. It was all we could afford at the time but I loved my ring. I remember thinking how delicate and unique and beautiful it was and how it was the only piece of jewelry that has ever stayed on my body for more than a few hours a day.

Something inside me screamed, “She needs a wedding ring!”

So I emailed her, asked for her address, and sent the sapphire ring in the mail. I didn’t even ask the size of her finger as I wanted it to be a surprise. Along with the ring was a note that asked one thing, “that her husband would put the ring on her finger.” I just knew my ring was meant to be her wedding ring.

When the ring arrived, she read the note to her husband. With tears in both their eyes, he placed the ring on her finger and to our surprise, the ring fit! The best part is that she wasn’t a diamond kind-of-gal and felt the sapphire really fit her personality.

Over the years, I’ve committed similar acts of kindness—clothes and food for the homeless, Christmas presents for struggling families, shoes for my son’s classmate who wore holes in the soles, free babysitting services for single parents, food for strangers mourning the loss of a loved one, household items and furniture to those starting a new life, handmade gifts for anyone who needed a little cheering up or kindness in their lives, and yes, even shelter to a young couple who found themselves homeless.

And not once have I asked for something in return. I simply completed these acts of kindness because I truly believed it was the “right thing to do”. I felt a nudge on my heart to reach out and I did. And every time I reached out, I felt blessed—even if the recipient wasn’t gracious in the receiving.

The truth is that people, by nature, aren’t gracious in receiving help—or even gifts for that matter. It hurts the pride.

So with some people, they lash out at you and act like you are trying to say you’re better than they are. And other people, as grateful as they are, simply don’t know how to accept something without feeling guilty for not being able to return the favor, or ashamed for being in that position in the first place.

But then there are those recipients who simply rejoice at the fact that they were not forgotten and show their appreciation with smiles and words of thanksgiving. And it’s those people that keep you sharing of yourself and your possessions. Because it’s those people who remind you that you are doing more than sharing an object or a meal, you are giving them hope. You are reminding them that they matter, that they are not forgotten, that someone cares.

It’s not always easy listening to the call. There are times when I’d rather spend the money and/or energy elsewhere; when I’d rather do for myself than for others; when I long for just one “thank you” or “nice job” or even returned favor.

But then I am taken back to the day my daughter died and how so many random acts of kindness were bestowed upon me and my family by complete strangers—even though we, ourselves, couldn’t be gracious or thankful— and how much it helped us heal. If it weren’t for all those people supporting us, nurturing us, lifting us up in prayer, providing meals, sending “we have not forgotten” cards, and showering us with kindness, we would not have survived the ordeal and our family would not be as strong as it is today. You could even say that had they not instilled hope in us, our family would’ve broken up.

Here’s the thing: random acts of kindness aren’t meant to be repaid by the recipient. It’s sort of a “pay it forward” kind of thing. And they must be disbursed to both strangers and loved ones—whether in need or not. And you can choose to do it secretively or openly, it doesn’t really matter.

What matters is that every random act of kindness you provide makes the world a better place. So go forth and create a chain reaction—go forth and make the world a kinder, gentler, less lonely place to live.

Give thanks…

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AlyiceEdrich.com
I'm a freelance writer, mixed media artist, SMVA, and the owner of The Dabbling Mum.

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